Doctor of Journalism: Archive

Jan 27th

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Jan 26th

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who wants to come down my street and egg some christians

Jan 26th

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Jan 26th

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Jan 26th

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I’ve squandered this.

Jan 26th

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Jan 26th

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“No matter how careful you are, there’s going to be the sense you missed...”

– Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

Jan 26th

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CONTENTS OF RIFTEN SLUTS BEDROOM

1 x The Lusty Argonian Maid volume 1 1 x The Lusty Argonian Maid volume 2 4 x Stamina potions 2 x sets of leather straps 1 x set of bed-mounted shackles and 1 x makeshift Horker Tusk dildo

Jan 24th

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The Lusty Argonian Maid

 Volume 1
 Act IV, Scene III, continued
Lifts-Her-Tail: Certainly not, kind sir! I am here but to clean your chambers.
Crantius Colto: Is that all you have come here for, little one? My chambers?
Lifts-Her-Tail: I have no idea what it is you imply, master. I am but a poor Argonian maid.
Crantius Colto: So you are, my dumpling. And a good one at that. Such strong legs and shapely tail.
Lifts-Her-Tail: You embarrass me, sir!
Crantius Colto: Fear not. You are safe here with me.
Lifts-Her-Tail: I must finish my cleaning, sir. The mistress will have my head if I do not!
Crantius Colto: Cleaning, eh? I have something for you. Here. Polish my spear.
Lifts-Her-Tail: But it is huge! It could take me all night!
Crantius Colto: Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time.
 END OF ACT IV, SCENE III
 -
 Volume 2
 Act VII, Scene II, Continued
Lifts-Her-Tail: My goodness, that’s quite a loaf! But how ever shall it fit my oven?
Crantius Colto: This loaf isn’t ready for baking, my sweet. It has yet to rise.
Lifts-Her-Tail: If only we could hurry that along. How would I accomplish such a task?
Crantius Colto: Oh, my foolish little Argonian maid, you must use your hands.
Lifts-Her-Tail: You wish me to kneed the loaf? Here?
Crantius Colto: Of course.
Lifts-Her-Tail: But what if the mistress catches me? Your loaf was meant to satisfy her appetite.
Crantius Colto: Don’t fret, my delicate flower. I’ll satisfy the mistress’ cravings later.
Lifts-Her-Tail: Very well, but I’m afraid my oven isn’t hot enough. It could take hours!
Crantius Colto: Plenty of time, my sweet. Plenty of time.
 End of Act VII, Scene II